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Me and the Stranger

I met a stranger long ago. This stranger suddenly asked me questions. After a couple week, the stranger asked me to have lunch together. Then I have this feeling with the stranger. Months after months. One day, the stranger asked me to have dinner together. The stranger asked me that question. After that, we have this consensus. At first, the stranger was nice. But then something happened. I was very mad at the stranger. I was very mad until that feeling suddenly gone. But I accepted the stranger's apology. Why? Just to make everything okay, because it was a special day and I didn't want it to be ruined. After that happened, the stranger changed. Until now. I overly cried about the stranger. Sometimes I ask myself, was it a good step to agree with the consensus? Do I regret what I've done? For me, that consensus is a principle. So I'll do my best to make that consensus stay lasting. I've sacrificed everything to meet the stranger real life. ...
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Random Poems by Me: Part I

I don't know if it's wrong or not What I know is it has differed To things that I hate about And things that should be burned Past is just a past We can occasionally recall it But we can't live there last Just go and move fast Have we done it right? Is this something worth to fight? Whatever, don't care about their thought Just come to me and hug me tight
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Overthinking

Yes, for anybody who knows me so well they definitely know that I've been had this disease for a long time. Overthinking. I often feel insecure. And when I'm insecure I'll overthink about it. And when I overthink about it, I -almost- always cry. Yes, I know. I'm a crybaby. The worst thing is that the one that always make me overthink is you . Yes, you . I don't know what happened to us. I just feel like there's a barrier between us. I always feel that you're hiding something. I know it's a silly intuition. But that feeling always distract my mind. It kills me slowly. And the way we chat, it always convince me that my intuition was right. Well, I hope that this intuition was wrong. I hope that I can stop overthink anything. I hope that I can live peacefully.
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Guten Morgen

I'm so sad that we're now rarely chat. Even a "good morning" from you every morning nowadays is just as precious as gold. I miss you really really bad. I've never imagine that long distance relationship will be this hard. I miss you, I hope that you also miss me as bad as I feel. Ich vermisse dich.
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Far away from home

Hai Yesterday I moved to my "kosan" in Bandung. I don't know for how long I'll be staying here because I still want to take one more test to another university. I feel so bored here. There's no sound of TV here, there's no sound of my sisters. So quite and silent. Besides, I don't know anyone here. I feel so lonely . This is not my first experience being far from home. I have been in Malang before, alone. But this time feels so different. I have to manage myself. I have to clean my room, travel with public transportation, and buy food for breakfast+lunch+dinner. This is way a new world for me. Being alone is okay, but being lonely is not okay. And I feel so lonely right now. I miss home. I miss you , who are so much far away from here. I'm so jealous with people who are in the same university with their close friends-or their boyfriend. I know this sounds so desperate but this is what I feel now. Lonely , so lonely .
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Hi

Hello Ok this is actually not my first post on my blog, but I've already deleted all of my post on this blog. The reason? Hmm I actually have no certain reason, but I just want to make a "brand new me" since I wrote those posts when I was in junior high and senior high. I want to make this blog more mature and more private (but I still put the link on Facebook and about.me tho). I want to change this blog to a kind of diary (or in our daily language "media untuk bercerita di mana gue bisa ngeluarin unek-unek tanpa ada yang baca-atau mungkin ada yang baca tapi gue gatau-tanpa ada yang ngasih pendapat tentang apa yang gue tulis, apa yang gue rasain"). So, if you are reading this post right now, don't expect something big. This is just a blog about my "celotehan yang tak terungkapkan". Well, yes I am an introvert.
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